Superiority/Inferiority Complexes

susannelson • January 21, 2011

Jesus had to go through Samaria. Well, He didn’t have to. It wasn’t like it was the only way or that He had no other choices. Most Jewish travelers took the long way around Samaria, avoiding the Samaritan people at all costs. Jesus had to go through Samaria because that was the only way to reach the people there.

John 4 gives us the story of Jesus’ meeting with the woman at the well. The woman was shocked and surprised that Jesus spoke to her that day. First of all, she was a Samaritan and Jews did not associate with them. The Jews considered them to be an inferior people, part Jew and part a lot of other nationalities. Hundreds of years prior, Assyria had captured the northern kingdom of Israel and had taken most of the people into exile in Assyria. Then Assyria brought in people from its other lands and settled them in Israel. They intermarried with the Jews who remained in the land, creating the Samaritan people. The Jews felt they were superior to them, making the Samaritans feel inferior. Being a Samaritan in those days was even worse than being a Gentile.

  The Samaritan woman was also shocked that Jesus spoke to her because she was a woman. Men did not speak to women in public – especially women they didn’t know. Men considered themselves to be superior and women were inferior. In addition to being a woman, she was a woman with a bad reputation. Why else would she be coming to the well at noon instead of in the early morning with the other women? She felt inferior because of her sin.

Galatians 3:28-29
There is neither Jew nor Gentile, neither slave nor free, nor is there male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus. If you belong to Christ, then you are Abraham’s seed, and heirs according to the promise.

When Jesus looked at the woman at the well, He didn’t see her the way others did. He didn’t see her as a Samaritan woman or a woman with a bad reputation and write her off. He saw her as a person who needed salvation and needed the love of God in her life. Even though He knew her sin, He spoke to her with respect and kindness. He offered her the “living water” that would quench her spiritual thirst. When she shared her experience with Jesus with others in town, they came looking for Jesus and found their salvation also.

The culture of that time had created barriers between the Samaritan people and God. The Jews thought they were the only ones going to heaven because they were the seed of Abraham. They thought their place was secure and that gave them a feeling of superiority over the Samaritans and the Gentiles. When Jesus came, he broke down those barriers. He spoke to Nicodemus about being born again – it wasn’t enough to be a descendant of Abraham. He spoke to the Samaritan woman about how we worship is more important than where we worship. It was about faith, not religious ritual.

Romans 12:3
For by the grace given me I say to every one of you: Do not think of yourself more highly than you ought, but rather think of yourself with sober judgment, in accordance with the faith God has distributed to each of you.

Feelings of superiority and inferiority still cause barriers in the church today. You have people who feel they are superior Christians. They have been serving God longer or better. They have titles and positions that they think elevate them above others. They also tend to be judgmental and do not associate with other Christians that they feel aren’t at a certain level. They may think their church or denomination is better than others. They put themselves on such a high pedestal that they miss opportunities to do what God has really called them to do. You can’t lead others to Christ from a superior position.

The Christians with the inferiority complexes are just as challenging. Even though they claim that Jesus is the Lord of their life, they walk around defeated. When a blessing comes their way, they think they don’t deserve it. They have a calling from God, but they don’t feel adequate to walk in that calling. They put themselves down and are constantly comparing themselves with others. Their lack of self-esteem makes them an ineffective witness for Christ.

James 1:9-10
Believers in humble circumstances ought to take pride in their high position. But the rich should take pride in their humiliation—since they will pass away like a wild flower.

In our journey, we can each fall into these categories at different times. There are times when we get on our high horse and we have to be knocked back down to earth. And there are times when we sink into self pity and have to be lifted up again. We are always growing and hopefully maturing so that we reach a middle ground. In that place, we can walk confidently but humbly for the Lord. Confidence should not be confused with superiority. Confidence means we know who we are in Christ and we know the promises of God are true. Likewise, humility should not be confused with inferiority. Being humble also means knowing know who we are in Christ – we know that he is our all in all. We submit to His authority and commit ourselves to His service.

Between Christians and non-Christians, these issues come into play. We, as Christians, do not want to become like the Jews from Biblical times. We should not see ourselves as superior over those who are not Christians. People know if you are looking down on them and they are not going to be receptive to you if you are making them feel inferior. God loves all mankind and it is His will that none should perish.

There are also times when people who are unsaved may say something along the lines of “you Christians think you are better than everyone.” Perhaps they have been treated poorly, but more likely this is coming from the feelings of conviction they are experiencing. It isn’t easy to confront our own sin and mistakes. We try to blame others or simply walk in denial. Christians need to be sensitive to these feelings and realize where they are coming from. Where there is a spirit of conviction there is a soul that realizes it needs salvation, and we can help lead that person to Christ.

Ecclesiastes 9:11
The race is not to the swift or the battle to the strong, nor does food come to the wise or wealth to the brilliant or favor to the learned; but time and chance happen to them all.

In other words, some days you are the windshield and some days you are the bug. Every dog has its day. Into each life, a little rain must fall. Pick your favorite saying. The bottom line is we are equal in God’s eyes. When we start feeling superior or inferior, we have to realize that we are out of step in our walk with God. We need a reality check and we need to remember who we are and not who we think we are. God is our superior, but He doesn’t make us feel inferior.

Jeremiah 9:23-24
This is what the LORD says:
“Let not the wise boast of their wisdom or the strong boast of their strength or the rich boast of their riches, but let the one who boasts boast about this: that they have the understanding to know me, that I am the LORD, who exercises kindness, justice and righteousness on earth, for in these I delight,” declares the LORD.

 

January 17, 2024
When you reach a certain age or stage in life, I think there is a natural tendency to look back on your life and reflect on how you got to where you are today. It makes you appreciate what you have. I had certainly found myself at that place in life, looking around and seeing how far we had come and how well we were doing. How good it was to feel secure and happy! It had not always been so easy. When we were first married, I was expecting to settle down in the place where I was born, among my own people, and raise a family, just as my mother had done. My husband had something completely different in mind. When he told me we were leaving our home to travel with his uncle to a new land, I was taken aback. Part of me was scared to leave the only place I had ever known, and the other part was caught up in excitement of it all. My husband believed that his uncle was hearing from the one true God, the Creator of the universe, and so he had also put his faith in this God. Because he believed, I believed. I can say that God did see us through on the journey, which was difficult at times. You try traveling with your family, a bunch of farm animals, and herdsmen. Even in the best of conditions, it was sweaty and smelly and exhausting. At one point, there was a famine in the land so bad that we had to travel to another area just to survive. Secretly, I questioned if we had made the wrong decision to leave home. There were many nights I cried myself to sleep. But, God brought us through it and we were able to return to the place God had called his uncle. All the while, God was blessing our family. My husband had acquired flocks and herdsman of his own. Pretty soon, there wasn’t enough room for all of us. Our herdsmen and his uncle’s herdsmen often quarreled. His uncle did not want these troubles to affect the family dynamic, so he suggested that we part ways and gave my husband first choice of which area to take. I was grateful to him for this kindness, and I must admit I was a little sad to leave what had become our family of wanderers. When I saw the beautiful, lush land where we were headed, I knew that the difficult journey had been worth it. We ended up living in the city of Sodom. We had settled in the community as strangers, but over time had built strong relationships with friends and associates. It wasn’t perfect, but what place is? What city doesn’t have crime or a seedier side? You learn what areas to stay out of and who to associate with if you want to stay out of trouble. We found our place there and raised our family. We had a nice home, and my husband was a leader in the community. Our daughters were to be married to fine young men and we had spent the better part of the year preparing them for their weddings. I also had gained the friendship and respect of other women, and we would often talk in the markets about our lives. I was so proud to talk about my husband and the upcoming weddings, and they were generous with their congratulations and well wishes. I couldn’t imagine our lives being any better. Our picture perfect life changed in less than 24 hours when two strangers arrived at the city gates. I guess it was no coincidence that my husband was sitting in the gateway of the city that evening. He invited them to spend the night in our home, which surprised me. I have say that there was something different about them. They weren’t the typical visitors who passed through our area who usually knew what to expect if they spent an evening in the town square, if you know what I mean. I knew our city had a reputation. I had always looked the other way, knowing things happened in the dark of night that were wrong in the eyes of God. I figured it was none of my business and it wasn’t my problem. I lived my life and they lived theirs. The events that happened that night happened so fast. It was surreal. I couldn’t believe it was happening. Our home was suddenly surrounded by men, young and old, who demanded we give our visitors over to them. My husband tried to reason with them. He even had the nerve to offer them our daughters, which really angered me at the time. I was ready to kill him myself. Quickly, the two visitors stepped in and rescued my husband from the crowd. Then the oddest thing happened. The men outside our home were suddenly struck blind and they went away, stumbling about. I was beginning to understand that these visitors of ours were more than they seemed. That’s when they told us they had come to destroy the city and we needed leave as soon as possible. My husband went to our daughter’s fiancés and begged them to come with us, telling them that God was going to destroy the city. They laughed, thinking he was joking. Who jokes about something like that? As the sun was getting ready to rise, the two men urged us to leave right away so that we would not be destroyed, too. It still had not registered with me that this was happening. Everything was quiet and still, so how could we be in imminent danger? How could we just leave? We needed to gather up food and clothing and things we would need to travel. We needed time to get ready. My husband and I just looked at each other, not knowing where to start. Suddenly, I felt a hand grab mine. One of the men had me by the hand and my husband by the other. The second man likewise had taken our daughters hands. They began rushing us out of the city, telling us to run and not look back or we would be swept away in the destruction. What destruction? I did not see or hear anything that made me think we were in danger. They wanted us to go to the mountains, but my husband begged to let us go to a smaller city far enough away from the danger. They agreed and said the destruction would begin as soon as we could get there. We ran for what seemed like forever. I didn’t know my old body could still do that. It still seemed like a bad dream, and that I would wake up soon and be back in my beautiful home. Then I heard the first rumble and felt the earth shake beneath my feet. The smell of smoke and something that smelled like rotten eggs filled my nostrils. I was getting tired from running. My husband and my girls where just ahead of me, entering the city of Zoar. I stopped to rest for a moment and I started to cry. How could we be here in the middle of nowhere, with nothing but the clothes on our back? Why did we have to leave our wonderful home where we had everything we needed? What about all the things we had collected for our daughters’ weddings? Why couldn’t we have saved some of those things. I wanted my life back. Without thinking, I turned around and looked at the city I had called home. Everyone and everything I knew was being pummeled in a rain of fire. As my family safely made it inside the little town of Zoar, I was still just on the outskirts. I stood there in the aftershocks of the fiery storm, grieving the life I had left behind. I realized my mistake too late as I felt the wave of heat and grit begin to take over my body. If only I had listened to the two men. If only I had trusted that God would take care of me in this situation, just as He had in the past. If only I had not looked back. Luke 17:32 - Remember Lot’s wife. If “Jesus wept” is the shortest verse in the Bible (John 11:35), then Luke 17:32 has to be the second shortest. More importantly, these words are in red, meaning Jesus spoke them. “Remember Lot’s wife, “ He cautions. “Lot’s wife” is all we know her by, and what we know about her is found in Genesis 19. Most people just remember that she turned into a pillar of salt. What we need to remember is why. The Hebrew word for “looked back” means more than just the physical act of glancing back over one’s shoulder. It means to regard, consider, or pay attention to something. She was not so much looking back with her eyes as she was with her heart. In that moment, as imagined in the passage above, she had more regard for what she was leaving behind than in the provision God had made ahead of her. She loved and appreciated the things of the world and her earthly treasures more than the divine deliverance that was provided to her. Even though she did not commit the same sins that had brought about this judgment, her heart was with the city and all things worldly, and so she suffered its same fate. In Luke 17, Jesus is cautioning the disciples, and us, to not make the same mistake. Luke 17:26-33 - 26 And as it was in the days of Noah, so it will be also in the days of the Son of Man: 27 They ate, they drank, they married wives, they were given in marriage, until the day that Noah entered the ark, and the flood came and destroyed them all. 28 Likewise as it was also in the days of Lot: They ate, they drank, they bought, they sold, they planted, they built; 29 but on the day that Lot went out of Sodom it rained fire and brimstone from heaven and destroyed them all. 30 Even so will it be in the day when the Son of Man is revealed. 31 “In that day, he who is on the housetop, and his goods are in the house, let him not come down to take them away. And likewise the one who is in the field, let him not turn back. 32 Remember Lot’s wife. 33 Whoever seeks to save his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life will preserve it. A quote attributed to Alexander Graham Bell says, “When one door closes, another opens; but we often look so long and so regretfully upon the closed door that we do not see the one which has opened for us.” Such was the fate of Lot’s wife. Such could be our fate if we are not careful. We cannot harshly judge Lot’s wife, knowing how easily the same thing could happen to us. We can find ourselves living comfortably, confident in our position in life, and relying on our material possessions, if we are not careful to remember the true Provider. It isn’t a bad thing to have material possessions, but it is a wrong attitude if we value the things of the world more than we value the things of God.  When you hear someone say, “Jesus is coming soon”, do you laugh like Lot’s son-in-laws, or do you start looking up and watching for Him? Just like Lot tried to warn his son-in-laws, we need to let our family and friends know that He is coming. As Christians, we should be ready to drop everything when He comes for us, and not look back for anyone or anything. There is nothing we are leaving behind that is better or more important than being with Jesus. When that day comes, just like it came for Sodom, we have to be ready for our divine deliverance from this world. If we dare to look back, we could be left behind. Remember Lot’s wife, and don’t look back.
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